Yesterday at work, I facilitated a group discussion about something many people struggle with:
Sharing our wrongs, our fears, and the things we're ashamed of.
The topic centered around opening up to others about what we're going through and why that can feel so difficult.
I asked the group a simple question:
"Why is it so hard for people to open up?"
The answers came quickly.
Some said:
- Shame
- Embarrassment
- Fear of being judged
- Fear that people will use the information against them
- Difficulty trusting others because they've been hurt before
Honestly, I understood their answers.
But I also had a hard time understanding them.
Not because they weren't valid.
Because I've been incredibly fortunate.
A Blessing I Don't Take for Granted
I'm blessed to have people in my life that I can talk to.
People I can tell about:
- My fears
- My mistakes
- My failures
- The times I've handled situations poorly
- The moments when I wasn't at my best
I'm fortunate enough to have people who support me even when I'm imperfect.
For me, talking about my problems isn't difficult.
Not because I don't have them.
But because I know I don't have to carry them alone.
Then I Asked a Different Question
After hearing everyone's concerns, I asked:
"If you aren't surrounding yourself with people you can trust, talk to, feel supported by, and feel loved by during difficult times... then who are you surrounding yourself with?"
The room went silent.
No one answered.
And maybe that's because it's a difficult question.
Sometimes we become so used to unhealthy relationships that we stop questioning whether they're healthy at all.
Sometimes we surround ourselves with people who criticize us more than they encourage us.
Sometimes we stay connected to people who make us feel small, judged, or unsafe.
And then we wonder why opening up feels impossible.
You Don't Have to Do It Alone
The reality is that not everyone has supportive people in their life right now.
And that's okay.
That doesn't mean you're stuck.
There are:
- Therapists
- Support groups
- Recovery programs
- Counselors
- Mentors
- Community organizations
There are people and places specifically designed to provide support.
Sometimes the first step isn't opening up to family or friends.
Sometimes the first step is finding a safe place to begin.
Who Can You Open Up To?
Take a moment and ask yourself:
- Who do I trust?
- Who makes me feel supported?
- Who can I be honest with?
- Who listens without tearing me down?
And if you can't answer those questions today, perhaps it's time to start building those connections.
Because you deserve people who support your growth, not just witness your struggles.
Don't be afraid to talk about your feelings.
That builds Confidence.
Making the effort to surround yourself with positive, supportive people you can open up to?
That builds Resilience.
And never forget:
You're already Beautiful.
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